Anyways another thing that caught my eye was yesterdays 24 magazine. On the front cover it says "Text trumps talk". Studies show human contact takes back seat to technology. In this article it talks about how too many people are using chatting online and their cell phones rather than face to face conversations. According to 24 a new study shows that people connect 17 times per day electronically with others compared to only two face to face encounters. This is definately showing that we as a society are relying too much on our "new technology" to make our social connections.
Being on Facebook or MySpace all day is one thing, but actually spending that time with your friends is another. A relationship expert in the article talks about how people are losing out emotionally by not talking to people face to face. I have to agree with this. I have some friends on facebook who have over 1000 friends on thier list. Seriously are they really this person's friend or does this person just know of these people. Ok sure some of these people on his list might really be his friend but I have to say only about 10 of those people on his list he can call his true friends. This is the same for my page. I have around 500 friends but they are not what I would call "quality" friends. Maybe about 10 of those people on that list I would call my friend. The others are just peopel I know from school, work, team sport, or people i've met once or twice through other people. I would never call most of these people on my list and ask them if they want to come over and babysit my daughter, because I don't know them very well and trust them enough to be alone with my child. Or I would never ask them to go to a movie. We would probably have nothing to talk about because we don't know each other very well.
The ones that I actually call my friends are the ones that I don't even really talk to on facebook. Once in a while I may comment on a photo they posted or thier status. but these are the people that I talk to on the phone or hang-out with and go to dinner and a movie. The other 490 people on my friends list are people that I don't even want knowing that much information about me. I don't want them seeing pictures of me getting drunk at a party or of my family vacation. They do not need to know what I am doing or who I am doing it with. If I am having a bad day I am not going to post it on facebook for those people to see i am going to call one of my friends and go for a drink and talk.
Sometimes I think it is a competition to see who has the most friends!
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I was actually going to talk about some of these issues in my own blog! I completely agree with you; nowadays, we rely so much on our digital technologies to communicate with others, that our understanding of relationships, and what constitutes as a relationship, has had to have been redefined; though you may not consider every person on your Facebook friendlist to actually be your friend, for instance…they are labelled as such and thus, to the rest of the world, they are your friends. Because we live in a world where “text trumps talk”, we also view the upkeep of friendships over texting and Facebook messaging to be completely acceptable and justifiable. Of course, I am guilty of this too. I just find it really sad how we don’t demand (or feel the need for) as much personal contact as we used to.
What these observations do is make me wonder why. Why is it that we don’t feel it is as necessary to talk to people face to face? Why is it that we feel communication through social networking sites, like Facebook, are sufficient for maintaining our relationships?
The first reason I came up with was convenience. Let’s face it; the world is a busy, busy place! We always have things to do and places to go: school, work, household responsibilities, sports games, business meetings…whatever…and it just seems like we can’t afford to spend as many evenings out with friends. This is where Facebook comes in handy. After coming home from school, and making dinner, and going to work, and finishing up bits of homework, I have no desire to go out. What Facebook allows me to do, however, is spend the rest of my night catching up with my friends without having to leave my home. Of course it’s not the same as seeing these people face to face…or even talking with them on the phone…but it’s not bad. I can chat with them, look at their pictures, and read their notes to find out how they’re doing…and I find this much more satisfying than having to wait weeks for the one afternoon where we can actually meet up and hang out together. This way, even though we can’t see each other as often, we can still stay connected and share experiences through our digital worlds.
Another reason I think so many people are turning to Facebook is because it gives them complete control over how others see them. Going back to your comment about how some people have added 1 000+ friends, I think part of this is due to the fact they just want to look good. Because it is possible for anyone in the world to see who we are, we tend to portray ourselves slightly (and sometimes not-so-slightly) different than how we truly appear. We want to make whoever is viewing our profile page think things like, “wow, she’s really popular!” or, “hey, this guy is really cool!” No one wants people to know they’re actually a 35 year old sandwich maker at Subway, still living in their parent’s basement...and we have the power to conceal this (and other) information. In my opinion, it gives people a sense of security and satisfaction, knowing people can only see them the way they want to be seen. If you’re self conscious about your legs, you only need to upload headshots in your albums. If you don’t like that comment you just posted, you can delete it…or edit and repost it. Unlike meeting someone in person, on Facebook you get second and third chances to make good impressions; you don’t have to worry about looking like a loser or saying the wrong thing, because two seconds later, you can just go back and change it.
First off...love the color scheme...love it.
Secondly...love the post...love it.
Now I'm done.
**THATS FOUR COMMENTS TED....HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW!!!!???!!!!! ARGGEEEEEGGGGGG!!!**
Well I didn't wanna babysit anyway...
I would like people to know that I have successfully kept my list of friends under 110. There were lots of disappointed people thinking I'm some easy friend pick up. Thinking, here's another one, and here's another one. Maybe I see a little too much in the term "friends", because I actually run the basis that if you're my friend in the past or present, you're gonna be on my list. It's not all fool proof however. This chick, who was my roommates ex, whom I didn't like, was very persistent. I just felt bad having to press the reject button over and over again. Especially when the button is beside the picture of the person.
REJECT.
She worked a mind game no doubt. She's like that first rust spot you find on your car. The dreams over man! Makes me so vexed!!
I've decided that my goal for the end of them is to cut my friend list down. Right now I cannot say how many are gonna be cut but some of them are!!!
I don't have anytime for face to face conversations anymore. A regular day for me is school.... work..... homework.... and spending time with my family. where in that time am I supposed to fit drinks with an old friend or a movie with my boyfriend. I even talk to my boyfriend on facebook chat some nights because he works nightshift and I am gone all day we have very little time to spend together. So if I have a question to ask him I just send him a message. And even though he is supposed to be working he checks his facebook every so often and replies to my message. This is alot more convient for me to do than call him on his work number and get the answering machine and leave a message.
One of my favourite parts of facebook is checking out my friends pictures they post. Especially the ones of the social gatherings that I have missed. Like parties I never made it to on Friday Night. By Sunday morning my friends have already posted pictures of the drunkest people at the party. And people have already commented on them "haha I don't even remember this pic". So even though I was not actually at the party with my peeps everything is still there for me to see what I missed (or even more so what I didn't miss).
I really like what Heather said about how facebook gives complete control over how people see them. It is totally a popularity test to see who has the most friends. It is a place for some people to brag about things they've done; embaress each other to make themselves feel better or even to hurt someone else. I've seen some of my friends posting some pretty sad stuff on thier status. Why would you want all these people that aren't even your true friends to know so much about your personal life. This is the one part about social networking that I don't get how some people can post it.
Like I said before my goal is to have only my true friends and family as my friends on facebook. So I don't have screen what I post on thier!!!!!
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